That's the true spirit of Christmas people being helped by people other than...
Men want to make women happy.
There's very little advice in men's magazines because men don't think...
The truth is I had always wanted to be a comedian but I really didn't have...
Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water the...
To me if life boils down to one thing it's movement. To live is to keep...
Where lipstick is concerned the important thing is not color but to accept...
I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive.
The IRS! They're like the Mafia they can take anything they want!
Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV.
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender but you don't have a top for...
There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.
Once you start doing only what you've already proven you can do you're on...
I love being a dad. I just love it.
The first real thought that I had of something that I might do was to write...
When I jumped off a roof in Cannes in a bee costume I looked ridiculous. But...
You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's...
Well all comedy starts with anger. You get angry and its never for a good...
It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day...
You may be able to fool the voters but not the atmosphere.
