I was meant to date the captain of the football team I was going to be on a romantic excursion every Saturday night I was destined to be collecting corsages from every boy in town before prom accepting such floral offerings like competing sacrifices to a Delphic goddess.
A woman tells her doctor 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says 'It's old age.' The woman says 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'
