Comedians don't laugh. They're too busy analyzing why it's funny or not.

I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny and mine happen to be often rude. Yes it's juvenile but that's me.

A comedian's body is funny as well as his mind being funny his whole personage is funny.

I mean sometimes... a comedian becomes an actor and they just don't deliver because the bottom line of comedy is to be funny and the bottom line of acting is to be truthful and they get that mixed up sometimes or don't even notice that that's the thing.

The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny.

Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves and I'm a professional funny guy.

The comedians I liked were Bill Cosby and Steven Wright like just always as a comedic actor. I always liked Gary Larson who's really funny for a cartoonist obviously.

The media bring our wars home but only rarely have they been able to do it in complete freedom.

We are a nation in which freedom is alive in the squares and streets in the daily work of the communications media in the open relationship between the governing and the governed.

You the foreign media have been the companion of my people in its long and painful journey to freedom.

When we through our educational culture through the media through the entertainment culture give our children the impression that human beings cannot control their passions we are telling them in effect that human beings cannot be trusted with freedom.

Whatever the immediate gains and losses the dangers to our safety arising from political suppression are always greater than the dangers to the safety resulting from political freedom. Suppression is always foolish. Freedom is always wise.

All Americans value the freedom of speech and the freedom of the press and I believe this is essential for our continued way of life. But with this freedom comes responsibility. That responsibility has been abdicated here by some in the media and some in the government.

For the past several years I have remained what others would consider underground. I did this in order to build a community of people like-minded in their desire for freedom and the right to pursue their goals and lives without being manipulated and controlled by a media protected military industrial complex with a completely different agenda.

Bush sees the evil as out there in the wider world residing in people who 'hate freedom'. Look at his immediate response to the pictures of prisoner abuse this is not what Americans do these are not our values.

I try to give the media as many confusing images as I can to retain my freedom. What's real is for my children and the people I live with.

Here's a nation one of the founding pillars was freedom of speech and freedom of expression. And yet we have imposed upon people restrictions on what they can say on what they can think. And the media is the largest proponent of this crucifying people who say things really quite innocently.

I grew up in a food-obsessed Italian family so food was always front and center in my life. I was a food obsessed person who morphed into a comedian and tried to figure out a way to make fun of my cake and eat it too.

After all the fertile land in the immediate neighbourhood of the first settlers were cultivated if capital and population increased more food would be required and it could only be procured from land not so advantageously situated.

Go to the grocery store and buy better things. Buy quality buy organic buy natural go to the farmers market. Immediately that's going to increase the quality of the food you make.

There are probably close to a million people in the hospitality industry here in the United States and there are probably only a few hundred opportunities in the food media industry.

I wasn't passionate about food until I'd been cooking for a while. I started long before food became part of the mainstream media. I just wanted to cook period.

I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately instead of at three o clock in the morning.

I love Nautilus and stretching. The results are immediate and that gives me the motivation to continue.