Usually when you see females in movies they feel like they have these metallic structures around them they are caged in by male energy.
The truth is I love being alive. And I love feeling free. So if I can't have those things then I feel like a caged animal and I'd rather not be in a cage. I'd rather be dead. And it's real simple. And I think it's not that uncommon.
As a young man you don't notice at all that you were after all badly affected. For years afterwards at least ten years I kept getting these dreams in which I had to crawl through ruined houses along passages I could hardly get through.