My father was an autodidact. It wasn't a middle-class house. Shopkeepers are aspirant. He paid for me to go to private school. He was denied an education - he had a horrible childhood. He got a place at a grammar school and wasn't allowed to go.
We have to consciously study how to be tender with each other until it becomes a habit because what was native has been stolen from us the love of Black women for each other.