You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. There's no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny and either it works or you're finished. It's impossible to predict anything.

Who knew Rob Lowe was funny? On 'Parks and Rec ' we've got some of the funniest comedy writers some of the funniest comedians in the world working there. And if anything we don't just effuse to one another and be like 'Oh Rob Lowe's really funny ' if he wasn't.

I have no idea what I'm going to say when I stand up to give a toast. But I do know that anything I say I find funny.

I had seen movies before that that had made me laugh but I had never seen anything even remotely close to as funny as Richard Pryor was just standing there talking.

I really wanted to just be a musician. I didn't want to be anything else but I was funny and all that.

You know what? I never really factor Hollywood into anything. I'm a black actor so I can't really control what Hollywood thinks. I gotta go do my thing and my jokes have got to be funny. Whatever I do has got to be great.

When I was a kid I didn't feel like I fit in because - this is really silly and I probably shouldn't say it but I didn't think anything was funny. So I used to go home and literally cry to my mom and my step-dad at the time and I didn't think anything was funny. I couldn't laugh.

Sometimes I feel like there are people just waiting for me to fall. The funny thing is I can't give them anything. I have just never been a partier even in school.

If you use tact you can say anything then make it funny.

It was always a fantasy of mine growing up - my favorite program was always 'Little House on the Prairie' - so I always wanted to wear those looks. When I was a child I wouldn't let my mom put me in anything but calico dresses and now... whaddaya know every day I'm in a calico dress basically so it's kind of funny.

I always find it kind of embarrassing kind of funny and kind of exciting. In New York I'm recognized a lot although nobody says anything. You know they stare at you just a second too long. But in Paris it's not as commonplace to be recognized.

It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.

I turned down 'Some Like It Hot.' See how smart I am? I felt I couldn't bring anything funny to it. The outfit was funny. I don't need to compete with the wardrobe.

My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.

I tend to head for what's amusing because a lot of things aren't happy. But usually you can find a funny side to practically anything.

Funny enough if you are looking at people these days who are putting Botox in their face and getting all sorts of plastic surgery we look at them and go I can tell you've had Botox. I can tell you've had plastic surgery. You look really strange to me. But no one's saying anything. We're just accepting the fact that they're strange-looking.

And I like to keep whatever is mine remaining that way. It's a funny little game to play and it's a slippery slope. I always say to myself I'm never going to give anything away because there's never any point or benefit for me.

I'm like bursting. I should be working. I don't want to take a break. It's funny on set I don't have to go to the bathroom I don't have anything wrong I'm perfectly fine so through-and-through. I'm not hungry. I'm literally not even in my own body.

It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to.

It is not funny that anything else should fall down only that a man should fall down. Why do we laugh? Because it is a gravely religious matter: it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd: for only man can be dignified.

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about he goes off and gets married.

If at first you don't succeed find out if the loser gets anything.

The IRS! They're like the Mafia they can take anything they want!

A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.