Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.

Doctors coin money when they do procedures but family medicine doesn't have any procedures.

One has a greater sense of degradation after an interview with a doctor than from any human experience.

I regret to this day that I never went to college. I feel I should have been a doctor.

As a physician I know many doctors want to utilize new technology but they find the cost prohibitive.

Honestly being a doctor could make you more close minded than regular people.

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for.

A pregnant woman facing the most dire circumstances must be able to count on her doctor to do what is medically necessary to protect her from serious physical harm.

Medical liability reform is not a Republican or Democrat issue or even a doctor versus lawyer issue. It is a patient issue.

Passion you see can be destroyed by a doctor. It cannot be created.

I'm strongly for a patient Bill of Rights. Decisions ought to be made by doctors not accountants.

I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis and I said compared to who?

When a man goes through six years training to be a doctor he will never be the same. He knows too much.

Growing up my dolls were doctors and on secret missions. I had Barbie Goes Rambo.

People are so afraid of authority figures and doctors are authority figures.

Some people think that doctors and nurses can put scrambled eggs back in the shell.

I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead.

The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing.

In the name of Hypocrites doctors have invented the most exquisite form of torture ever known to man: survival.

I was always shocked when I went to the doctor's office and they did my X-ray and didn't find that I had eight more ribs than I should have or that my blood was the color green.

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation he offered to touch-up my X-rays.

My doctor gave me six months to live but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more.

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.

Whenever a doctor cannot do good he must be kept from doing harm.